i was feeling like total crap for two days straight. it felt like i was trying to get the flu. i had sort of a head cold going on, i was achy, my stomach was upset - all that good stuff. i also had nightmares both nights, and i was crying a lot. crying about anything & everything. after "what the hell is wrong with me?!" went through my head several times, it dawned on me that i'd neglected to take my stupid effexor both days. sheesh. i'm not sure about the nightmares, but all those other things seem to be pretty common side effects of quitting effexor xr cold turkey. the stupidest thing is that i didn't even mean to quit - i just forgot to take the damn pills. it's kind of scary, though, that it freaked my body & my brain out so much, so quickly. i don't like that.

so for me to say that my state of mind hasn't really improved much over last week is probably needless. not yet, anyway. now that i'm back to taking my drugs, i'm hoping that things will get back to 'normal'. normal isn't great, but it's as sure as hell better than this.

it's dark. it's distressing. it's deplorable. lots of other d-words, too, but i'll just give up now.

...

p.s.

I love you man. You are probably the drink with the most fan clubs ever. A lot of people depend on you and your caffeine content to keep them up all night. Others are just addicted. Find your inner cola.

i found that one via dave. i would have been confused if i wasn't mountain dew, considering how horribly addicted i am to the stuff.