blah. i haven't written anything of substance lately because i've had absolutely no motivation to write. i'm going to assume that this is just a passing phase. wow. i just checked my archive and it's been a year, to the day, since i've started writing in this diary on a regular basis - and now i have no motivation. is that a sign? perhaps. maybe i'm stagnating. it's time to renew my gold membership, which i of course don't have to do to continue to use dland, but if i am going to use dland, i'd rather be gold. according to an email i got today, i guess i have 9.98 days or so to make up my mind.
... morei'm beginning to think my medicine isn't working anymore. i haven't been to see dawn in months now, so that might be part of it, too. i seem to do better when i'm doing both. sometimes it's just very hard to tell if it's really illness or just apathy. knowing myself as well as i do, 'apathetic' wouldn't be a word that i'd use to describe myself very often. of course i'm apathetic about some things - i think most of us are. normally, though, i'm such a heap of wound up emotion. i'm overemotional, which i feel is a liability most of the time. so where's this indifference about everything coming from? i dunno.
earlier today i was quite irritated by my mental inertia, so i told myself to do something creative. i felt like doing something i'd never done before, so i made a doll. yay me.
i got the base from Josie's Dollz
random movie quote:
"i'm as liberal as the next guy."
"if the next guy is a redneck."